I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Do vagina's smell?
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
