Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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