im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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