you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize