But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize
