Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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