Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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