Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize
