i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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