Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
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