I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
