Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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