38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
