I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
You can't just leave with hair like that
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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