An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize