Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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