hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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