Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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