the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
