party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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