Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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