Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize