If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Acid is not a monday night drug
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
