sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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