I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
