no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
His hands were made for my vagina.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
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