normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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