And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Randomize