they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
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