im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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