don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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