he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Randomize
