Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Vodka?
Forever.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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