i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
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