i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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