i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
