Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
He had one of those small greek statue penises
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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