so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
