some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
only if we run a train.
done.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
