Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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