John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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