So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
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I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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