Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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