Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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