he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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