i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
