He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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