ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
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