he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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