We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
